Friday, July 10, 2015

Limited TIme Offer snippet

Here's a bit of one of my favorite scenes from Limited Time Offer...




Levi whistled as he strolled back to Scott’s office, where he was doing something crazy with Photoshop, working on the ideas they’d come up with. “Check it out.”

Levi peered at his monitor. A big hairy dude reclined in a bathtub full of bubbles reading a book, his feet hanging over the edge, a glass of wine sitting on the side of the tub. With no copy, the only words were on the label of the beer bottle in the bottom right corner—Flying Pigs Pale Ale.


Levi grinned. “Yeah! Perfect.” Just what they’d talked about.


“And this one.” Scott clicked his mouse. Another image appeared, this one two men holding hands.
Levi shook his head and sighed. “Nah. That one doesn’t work. Too homophobic.”


“I thought so too. One more.”


Another dude in a pink tank top and tiny athletic shorts appeared, again with the Flying Pigs Pale Ale bottle.


“Awesome.”


“Last one.”


Back to the hairy dude in the bathtub who had one leg out of the water covered with shaving foam and a shaver in his hand. Levi snorted with laughter. “I fucking love that one.”


Scott grinned. “Okay.” He turned away from his computer. “We need to get to work on the Natural Belgian Blonde. You know where we’re going with that one.”


“Pamela Anderson.”


“Dude. Natural blonde.”



“Can we make some kind of joke about the curtains matching the carpet?”


“Fuck no!” Scott paused. “Besides, these days there isn’t as much carpet.”


“Ahaha!” Levi laughed so hard he just about split a gut.


Scott laughed too.


Then… “I know!” Levi just about blew up. “There’s no actual blonde woman in the ad. Just a picture of carpet and drapes. That don’t match. No, no…they do match. Perfectly. With some kind of crazy pattern.”


“Ah!” They leaped up and high-fived each other. “Hang on, hang on.” Scott clicked his mouse a few times and Pharrell William’s “Happy” blasted from his computer. They both started dancing. Levi had his arms in the air and was thrusting his pelvis when Joseph Huxworth walked by. Joseph paused and eyed them. And he wasn’t alone. Presumably that was a client. Crap.


Levi dropped his arms and jerked his head at Scott, who lunged for his computer mouse and cut the music.


“Uh, hey, Mr. Huxworth.” Levi smiled. “Just celebrating our incredible creative genius.”


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