Thursday, July 1, 2010

Quiz: How Canuck are you?





It's Canada Day and I loved this quiz! Hope you  LOL! (Though only true Canucks may get the jokes!)


Take this quiz to determine your Canuckish-ness, eh
By: Doug Speirs

It's the day before Canada Day, a time of tradition, a time of celebration, a time of patriotism, a time when we Canadians, as a nation strong and free, look deep in our hearts and realize an essential truth -- unless we get to the liquor store right away we are going to be trapped in a lineup longer than the Great Wall of China.

But do not become discouraged, Canada, because while you are creeping along at the speed of airport luggage in that traditional pre-holiday lineup, you will have plenty of time to think about what it means to be Canadian.

First, we are a young country. In fact, tomorrow Canada will turn ... um ... OK, perhaps while the rest of us are trapped in this line, a non-drinking Canadian could look on the Internet and let the rest of us know how old our country will be on July 1.

Not that age is important. What's important is that you know in your heart you are as Canadian as ... um ... as the Robertson screwdriver or the Automatic Postal Sorter or fivepin bowling. You know that, right?

OK, short of looking at your driver's licence, how can you be sure you're, in fact, a true Canadian?

Well, one surefire way is to take our Day Before Canada Day multiple-choice quiz to determine your degree of Canuckish-ness.

Let's get started, eh:
Question No. 1 -- Complete the following lyrics: "O Canada ..."


a) "We stand on cars and freeze."

b) "Na na na na, hey hey hey, goodbye!"

c) "My roaming naked band."

d) "Ohhhhhhh, I will alwaaaaaays love youuuuuuuuuu!"



Question No. 2 -- The Canadian Football League may add another team. What should they be called?

a) Roughriders.

b) The Roughriders.

c) Maple Leafs.

d) Rough Riders.



Question No. 3 -- What is your primary source of culture?

a) The CBC.

b) Yogurt.

c) Shopping online.

d) Canadian Tire.



Question No. 4 -- You know the end of the world is here if ...

a) Dogs and cats start living together.

b) It doesn't rain during the Red River Exhibition.

c) You go to Tim Hortons for coffee and there ISN'T a lineup.

d) The Toronto Maple Leafs win the Stanley Cup.



Question No. 5 -- You can tell someone is Canadian if they correctly use which phrase ...

a) Make mine a double-double, eh?

b) Hand me that two-four?

c) Would you like a serviette with your poutine?

d) I hit a deer with my snowmobile.



Question No. 6 -- When you refer to "block-heaters" you are talking about ...

a) Winter hats in Newfoundland.

b) The furnace in your apartment block.

c) Canada's No. 1 punk rock band.

d) Something you will never remember to unplug, not even if your wife staples a reminder note to your forehead.



Question No. 7 -- During the World Cup tournament, you are cheering for ...

a) Not the U.S.

b) Someone other than the U.S.

c) Is Mexico technically part of the U.S.?

d) The Toronto Maple Leafs.



Question No. 8 -- Canada is the leading exporter of ...

a) Softwood lumber.

b) Celine Dion albums.

c) Senior citizens to Florida.

d) NHL teams.



Question No. 9 -- If the U.S. declared war on Canada, you would ...

a) Demand the immediate release of William Shatner.

b) Put the submarines at West Edmonton Mall on high alert, and briefly consider locking your front door.

c) Feel really proud because that cute news anchor on CNN mentioned your province.

d) "Que'est-ce que vous avez dit, monsieur?"


To find out how Canadian you are, assign yourself 10 points for each correct answer.

We trust you to do this on your own. Because you don't need someone looking over your shoulder. Because you are honest to a fault. Because, in this country, we operate on the honour system.

Because if you believe any of that, you're a Canadian for sure.

doug.speirs@freepress.mb.ca
Republished from the Winnipeg Free Press print edition June 30, 2010
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