Wednesday, May 13, 2009

What I'm Reading Wednesday


I’m so happy to report that this week I read a book by a favorite author that didn’t disappoint – love the one you’re with by Emily Giffin. Oh my goodness. This book brought me to tears at the end, and resonated with me for so many reasons. The suspense of wondering what Ellen would do kept me turning the pages, and Ellen’s inner conflicts between attraction, love, passion, comfort, fidelity, and morality had a knot in my stomach as I read. I also love a story that leaves some questions unanswered and keeps me thinking about it long after I've finished reading.

Ellen asks if there are always shades of grey when it comes to matters of the heart, and I say – YES! There is no black and white, right or wrong, good or bad when it comes to love. There are always nuances and layers and shades. That’s why I love writing about love.

Another reason this book spoke to me is because I’ve lived a part of that story. I’ve had that intense relationship and then found a quieter, peaceful love. I’ve had the questions about passion, about highs and lows or easy contentment, questions about “settling”. I’ve wondered about the fork in the road. Like Ellen, I’ve wondered what life would be like if the path had been different, and also like Ellen, I felt I didn’t have the choice at the time. Unlike Ellen, I’ve never been tested to actually have to make that choice, although I’ve dreamed it and imagined it and…I’ve written about it.

This story is so similar in themes to my next release, Worth Waiting For, which is another reason it resonated with me so deeply. Have you ever wondered what would happen if the one you loved passionately, the “one who got away” returned to you? How you would feel? How you would react? If you had the chance to make a choice – what would you choose?

Ainslie in my book has a chance to make that choice and hers turns out differently than Ellen’s in Emily Giffin’s book, although the situation is a little different as well.

Here are a few lines from love the one you’re with:

“But maybe that’s what is all comes down to. Love, not as a surge of passion, but as a choice to commit to something, someone, no matter what obstacles or temptations stand in the way. And maybe making that choice, again and again, day in and day out, year after year, says more about love than never having a choice to make at all.” And -
“Love is the sum of our choices, the strength of our commitments, the ties that bind us together.”

What do you think - is love a surge of passion or choice we make?
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